More than an update

So it’s been months since I last posted. I’ve changed my social media over to personal and haven’t updated because life has not been easy, and my last priority was blogging – family and self first, that’s important right? 

So is visibility, so I’m back! 

It’s been almost a year since T and I separated and we’ve had a lot of learning to do. We’ve chosen to take a different approach to the separation and make sure we still support each other, for the sake of the kids. This basically means that we talk, make important decisions together, and still parent the children consistently. Which for them I think works better than if we were at war.  We both have new partners, whom the children have met. And we still plan our lives around the babies. I mean they’re not babies any more, Finn is almost 8! Dylan is off to secondary school this September, and after a bit of appealing we got her a place in a grammar school, which is the school she wanted. 

So things were catastrophic. For me, for Trish and for the kids. There could have been so many outcomes, and there should have been a million ways to deal with this but we chose kids first. It’s always kids first, regardless of how hard that was for us. 

We’ve set boundaries, where we aren’t in each other’s pockets all the time. We have our lives, which are separate. We are not friends. But we are trying to get to know each other again . 

So what have we been up to in the last few months?

I’ve moved from my temporary accommodation into a flat which has enabled me to have the kids overnight. We chose to leave them with T as its their home and they’d had enough upheaval with me leaving. I see them as much as I can around work. I don’t get the same days off every week so its hard to work something out that is consistent.

Vikki and I have been together for over 6 months now. And I can honestly say that I haven’t been this happy ever. The kids love her.

We’ve been on some adventures. We took the kids to Camber sands, took them camping and we’ve been on some super fun days out!

Confession

I’ve never lived alone before and living in my temporary accommodation (I was there for 8 months) I still relied heavily on other people to do a lot for me like my washing. So at 32 I’m learning to be alone, and spend time doing things that make me feel ok and feel good.

We are back on instagram!

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