No more babies….

No more babies!

So this is a kinda hard decision for me. I’ve never physically carried a child, we have decided as a couple that we aren’t having any more children. For the foreseeable future. This is not a complete no, but generally not for at least 5/6 years at least.

But you have 4 kids already, what’s the problem?

Yes we do have 4 kids who all have the same biological mother, Trish. But I feel maybe my body is going to waste or I’m missing something. When we had Dylan, our first baby together, we were inseparable. I was there from conception to birth. Then had to leave for a month for work when she was 3 months old! She is really a mini me, and when Trish went back to work I decided to stay at home, which I did until she started school. Trish struggled to bond with her but overcompensated when Finn was born. He was very sick with severe reflux. She wouldn’t let anyone (me included) even hold him, this was part down to post natal depression. I love him so much, his birth was so traumatic for me, I didn’t really bond with him. Trish was out of it and in a lot of pain and the midwife was down right evil! We do boy stuff together. He has his big brother who is fantastic with him, so he’s not really missing out. Maybe if I had carried him it would be different I feel like something is missing and i cant put my finger on it.

Anyway, tangent over, back to the babies.

No more babies, I’m 26. Is that too early to call it a day?

I’ve had a load of reproduction issues and haven’t even had a cycle since the week Dylan was born (she is 6 in may). I’m going through a ton of tests, and had an MRI last weekend. Doctors are leaning towards pcos and cushings disease, which can’t be good together but could be managed by drugs which is cool. These things cause weight issues which is something I’ve struggled with for a long time. I don’t think I will truly be happy with my weight until I’m back down to what I was when trish and I met, that’s a long way to go!

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